Thursday, January 13, 2011

Mine Heart

So in the same school day, M brought home a teacher report card that said "she has many friends"- and M reported in an almost tearful voice that two friends had "broken mine heart into a million pieces". So, which do I believe? Probably both, I guess.

Turns out, it was two friends who were playing and wouldn't let her play with them. I hear a lot of this. There's one girl in particular who, if she is playing with someone, no one else can. I kept hearing this over and over so many times that I finally talked with M's teacher about it. Only to find out that she wasn't the only one this girl was doing this to.

I have discovered that it is my karmic payback to have a mini-me who feels just as rejected as I did when friends didn't want to play with her. Except that all I see is a beautiful, sweet girl who I can't imagine anyone not wanting to play with.

I tried to talk with her about just finding someone else to play with and that sometimes it's okay if they have enough people for their game. Then my drama queen explained that everyone always has enough people for their game.

I know she's a drama queen. I know she exaggerates. She's a mini-me, remember? I just am not that good at helping her reconcile her rejection yet.


Spencer Family said...

We were talking about this EXACT same thing at work yesterday only we were talking about a group of boys. Jordan and five of my coworkers sons all range in age from 3-6. They all love playing together BUT so many times two of them will break off and play their own games and won't let any of the others play with them. And who the two are varies. It is so crazy. We can't figure out why they don't ALL play together--it would seem like way more fun!

Sorry M is going through this too! It is hard to be the third wheel or be on the outside. If she loves playing with these girls maybe invite them over for playdates individually?

Heather said...

If it makes you feel better, I was NEVER the popular girl either, oh the stories I could tell of my own rejections as a child. But I too am having some friendship issues with my pre-schooler. A boy named Sam harasses my girl daily to the point that my girl is crying at school every day. When I asked her if she could ignore Sam and play with the other kids she told me, "I just cry so the other kids don't want to play with me". She is a loner at recess everyday because of this and so when I brought it up with her teacher, she has been doing her best to seperate Sam and R but he still somehow gets to her. I admit that I find myself getting upset with Sam and his parents for allowing him to be a bully but I know that isn't right. It's hard watching your child get rejected when all they want to do is be included.....don't even get me started now when it comes to my special needs kid! Whew, that's a whole other can of worms!!

Sumpy Gump said...

Awww, poor M. Growing up is rough.

My mom said that when I was little, my older siblings would sometimes do that to me, but she said I didn't care and I would just go off and do my own thing.

My mom said that most of the time the other kids would stop what they were doing and come and play with me because the thing I was doing looked more fun.

I hope things work out for little M.